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4:48 p.m. - 2006-03-24
Tatting and animals
mARCH 24, 2006
TATTING. This is an art, something like crocheting or knitting but requiring special tools, patience and ability. My husband's cousin is a really good tat-ter. She learned from her mother and wants to teach me. And I want to learn ......

She made me a cross, snowflakes of different sizes, a book mark, a christmas tree and a few valentines. There is so much detailing.

You need thread, a shuttle and a tatting needle. At least I wouldn't have to pay for the lessons...

Our cousin collects the shuttles too. She has them in frames, all different colors. They are very simple but very attractive. I have seen some that are hand painted with animal designs.

I think I will wait until I retire to take on these lessons...

%%%% Now for some jokes.

Subject: Catholic Blonde


On their honeymoon, the blonde bride slipped into a sexy nightie and,
with great anticipation, crawled into bed, only to find that her new
Catholic husband had settled down on the couch.


When she asked him why he was apparently not going to make love
to her, he replied, "It's Lent."

In tears, she remarked, "Well, that is the most ridiculous thing
I have ever heard! Who did you lend it to, and for how long?

#########
A wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for several
YEARS.

One night, during one of their rendezvous, she confided in him that
she was pregnant.

Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he said he would
give her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy and secretly
have the child.

If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide
child support until the child turned 18.

She agreed, but asked, "How will you know when the baby was born?"

To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and
write `Spaghetti` on the back. He would then arrange for child
support payments to begin.

One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
"Honey, you received a very strange post card today," she said. "Oh,
just give it to me and I will explain it later," he said.

The wife obeyed, and watched as her husband read the card, turned
white, and fainted.

On the card was written: Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with
meat balls, one without.

#######

An elderly woman had just returned to her home from an evening of church
services when she was startled by an intruder. She caught the man in the
act of robbing her home of its valuables and yelled, STOP! Acts 2:38!
(Repent and be baptized, in the name of Jesus Christ so that your sins
may be forgiven.)

The burglar stopped in his tracks. The woman calmly called the police
and explained what she had done.

As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar, "Why
did you just stand there? All the old lady did was yell a scripture
to you."

"Scripture?" replied the burglar. "She said she had an Ax and Two 38's!"

PASS THIS ON TO SOMEONE WHO NEEDS A LAUGH TODAY and remember knowing scripture can save your life in more ways than one

#######
HOW TO CLEAN THE HOUSE

1. Open a new file in your PC.
2. Name it "Housework."
3. Send it to the RECYCLE BIN.
4. Empty the RECYCLE BIN.
5. Your PC will ask you, "Are you sure you want to delete Housework permanently?"
6. Calmly answer, "Yes," and press the mouse button firmly.
Feel better? Works for me!

########
this is so much fun...

This one will drive you nuts!!

The object of the game is to move the red block around without getting
hit by the blue blocks or touching the black walls.

If you can go longer than 18 seconds you are phenomenal.
It?s been said that the US Air Force uses this for fighter pilots. They
are expected to go for at least 2 minutes.

Give it a try!! My son got 38.++ seconds on the first try, I have worked up to 12+ myself.....

http://tinyurl.com/56t9u> http://tinyurl.com/56t9u

########


I OWE MY MOTHER

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside.
I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you
into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
" Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck,
you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're
in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times.
Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world
who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going
to get stuck that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think
I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes,
don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables,
you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think
you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope
they turn out just like you

$$$$$$$$$
Have you ever gone to your local Pet Refuge or Pet Adoption Center? Sometimes they take the animals to pet stores to be adopted. Often times you can find nearly every color and breed you might be looking for.

Our local Pet Refuge spays the animals, puts a micro chip under their skin and makes sure they are up to date with their shots....all for one price. You pay about $80 and everything is done. All you have to do is select your pet and take it home.

Most Pet Refuges can use donated items. Old blankets, towels, dishes or toys and even food donations. Also, if you love animals, you may be eligible to be a foster parent for some of the strays as they come into the shelter. Sometimes, they need special care or have medical needs and do better in a quieter setting.

Our area has a Pet Refuge and a Cat Corner and Humane Society and another pet shelter. They also on online and put pictures of the pets that are available. We could fall in love many times every week if we adopted all that we see. Out of 6 cats that we have had, 3 were from Refuge areas and only one of those 3 did not work out for us.

Good Night

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